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10. Kendi kendine öğrenmek derken...

             

       ''Biz öğretmiyoruz diyorsunuz, peki çocuk kendi kendine nasıl öğrenecek?''; bu benim karşılıklı konuşmalarda anlatmakta en çok zorlandığım konu. ''Kendi kendine'' diyip omuz silkiyor ve öyle, gözüne far sıkılmış tavşan gibi kalıyorum. Yani oturup saatlerce çocuğumun kendi kendine öğrendiği örnekleri sıralayamam. Başkalarından da örneklerle anlatamam, havada kalıyor. Çünkü, her bireyin öğrenme süreci ve öğrenme tarzı kendine özgü ve biriciktir.

       Ben çocuğumu, bir konuda yeri geliyor günlerce, haftalarca, aylarca gözlemliyor ve neyi nesıl öğrendiğini ancak bu şekilde görebiliyorum. Peki bu gözlem deneyimimi karşımdakine bir muhabbet esnasında nasıl anlatabilirim? Bir kere, öğrenilen konular içinde benim çocuğumun özeli olabiliyor, onları zaten geç, anlatmam! Geriye kalan konularda ilerleme çok yavaş ya da benim beklentimden daha hızlı olabiliyor ama dile getirdiğimde, öncesinde kafamda oluşmuş beklentiyi ya da öngörüyü de karşı tarafa aktarmam gerek ve bu da çok zor. Bu aktarım için karşımdakinin, beni de çok iyi tanıyor olması, konuya hakim olması ve gerçekten merak ediyor olması gerek. Dolayısıyla, bu kendi kendine öğreniyor kısmını ben, kendi deneyimlerimiz üzerinden örneklendirerek sözlü olarak pek anlatamıyorum.

       Ayrıca çocukların, olumlu ya da olumsuz olarak karşılaştırılmasına da karşı olduğum için, ''benim çocuğum şunları öğrendi ama daha bunları bilmiyor'' gibi anlatımlara girmek de bana göre değil pek. Laf lafı açınca konuşmuyor değilim, ama yine de net olarak ayrıntılı anlattığım bir durum olmuyor.

       Ben bunu en güzel, beynin çalışma prensipleri ve nasıl işleyiş gösterdiği ile ilgili okuduğum kaynaklar sayesinde anlamıştım, somut olarak. Üzerine Seyyah'ın gelişim süreci boyunca sağlam gözlem yapıyor oluşumuz eklenince kafamızda her şey yerli yerine oturdu. İbrahim'le aramızdaki iletişim ise bu konuda paha biçilmez değerde gerçekten. Evet aslında uygun ortam sağlandığında ve kişinin mizacı ve merakı törpülenmeyip zamanlama da doğru ilerlediğinde, her bireyin kendi kendine öğrenebildiğine ve bunun için, eğitim sisteminin gereklerine mecburi bir ihtiyacı olmadığına ikna oldum.

       Peki kendi kendine öğrenmek derken; biz aile olarak bunun için neler yapıyoruz?

       Önceliğim her zaman, çocuğumu tanımak oldu. Ebeveynlik sürecimizde İbrahim'in de benim de en büyük ve belki tek (daha fazla olmasına gerek de yok zaten, bu bir yarış değil) başarımız çocuğumuzu çok iyi tanıyor olmak. Ebeveynlerin yaşamında sanki biraz eksik kalan noktalardan biri ve en önemlisi bu diye düşünüyorum. Çocuğumu tanıdığımda, Matrix filmindeki Neo'nun ilk bölümün son sahnesinde, her şeyi kod olarak ve en gerçek haliyle görmesi gibi hissediyorum kendimi.

       Onu dinliyorum, anlıyorum, sorduğu cevaplara onun ihtiyacı olduğu gibi ve istediği miktarda cevap veriyorum. Ne eksik ne fazla. Cevabım ona yetmediyse sormaya devam ediyor ve talep ettiği ölçüde ayrıntıyla anlatıyorum; cevabı uzatıyorsam beni susturuyor ve saygı duyup susuyorum. Merakını asla hiç bir nedenden ötürü ertelemiyor, ötelemiyor ve o merakı tatmin etmesi için gerekli olan ortamı sağlıyorum. Kitap gerekiyorsa kitap, cevabı biliyorsam kendi bilgimle, bilmiyorsam araştırıp, bir bilene sorup, o an öğrenemeyeceksek de üzerine fikir yürütüp konuşabiliyoruz; daha sonra gerçek cevabı bulmak üzere...

       En çok da, öğrendiği bir şeyi kafasında demlemesine bayılıyorum. Bazen sadece bir kaç dakika, bazen günlerce üzerine düşündüğünü görebiliyorum. Bazen konunun devamı üzerine yeni soru aylar sonra geliyor, düşünülmüş ve mantıklı bir soru olarak. Bizim hatırladığımızdan fazlası hatırlanıyor bazen onun tarafından. Söylediği hiç bir şeyin boş olmadığını görmek ise, bizi senelerdir en çok şaşırtan tarafı bu konunun.

       Bir şey öğrenmek istediğinde başvurduğu tek kaynak biz değiliz ve yöntem de sadece soru sormak değil elbet. Bununla ilgili olarak yazımın bu bölümüne, tanıdığım ve takip ettiğim diğer okulsuzları da gözlemleyerek, daha önce yazdığım bir yazıyı ekleyerek devam etmek istiyorum.

       Çocuk;

       kendi kendine öğrenirken; bir video izleyerek bunu yapabilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; doğru kaynağı bulup açıp okuyabilir.

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; anne ve babasıyla tartışabilir,  sorabilir, onlarla araştırma, deney vb. yapabilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; konu üzerine sadece uzun süre tek başına düşünebilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; hareket edebilir, atlayıp zıplayıp, öğreneceği konuyu nasıl kafasında tutacaksa o hareketlerle ifade ederek deneyimleyebilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; deneyiminden faydalanacağı bir yetişkine ya da konunun uzmanına ihtiyaç duyup, ulaşıp, bu kişiden faydalanabilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; müzik dinleyebilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; günlerce, haftalarca, aylarca aralıksız okuyabilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; tek bir konuyla günlerce, haftalarca, aylarca istediği gibi ve ihtiyaç duyduğu derinlikte ilgilenebilir. 

      Kendi kendine öğrenirken; aynı şeyi yüzlerce-binlerce  kez tekrar edebilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; konuyu hemen anladıysa bir kere okuyup geçip bir daha asla geri dönmeyebilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; konuya bağlı olarak gerçek mekanlarda bulunup konuyla ilgili gerçek insanlarla ya da gerçek araç gereçle haşır neşir olabilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; elinin aynı yerini defalarca yakıp, kolunu aynı yerden defalarca kırabilir ve iyileşir iyileşmez tekrar deneyebilir. 

       Kendi kendine öğrenirken; ortalığı inanılmaz dağıtıp, inanılmaz kirletebilir; sonra da toplayıp temizlemeyi öğrenir ☺️...

       Çocuk kendi kendine öğrenirken müthiş özgürdür. Anne ve baba ise destek olur, imkanları ölçüsünde yardım ve yataklık yapar. Nihayetinde herkes aslında her şeyi kendi kendine öğrenebilir. Kendine en uygun yolları bulup o yollardan ilerleyerek.

 

       Zeynep

 

 

 

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